I Believe

The sleepless nights I've been experiencing lately have made me turn to God very frequently these days. Quiet time with God is what I look forward to these nights - talking to Him and having His words speak to me in return is very satisfying. Tonight is one of those nights.

I don't exactly know what has happened. I'm going to leave for university in a few days, and with it I want to take along the great memories I had with me. I want to leave with pride, for I have made my parents proud. But it saddens me that certain things have changed even before I leave. I find myself turning to other people rather than to those I used to turn to when I needed someone to talk to. I can't seem to grasp the meaning behind it - it's unfair to say that those people have changed. Maybe it's just me. But all I know is that things have changed. Relationships have changed, friendships have changed.

I find this particular verse very meaningful, "These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold - and your faith is far more precious to God than mere gold. So if your faith remains strong after being tried by fiery trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honour on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world" (I Peter 1:7).

As I turn the pages of the Bible tonight I come to this, "Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and He will give you all you need from day to day if you live for Him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today" (Matthew 6:32-34). This is indeed very reassuring. I know that every feeling I have in me right now, He feels them too. I am scared of the changes that have occurred lately, I am worried that friendships will come to an end.

But I've decided to put all my trust in Him. I believe that He has plans directed for me. I believe that the things that have happened, however bad they may be, are part of His plans. I must say that I am glad I choose to trust Him at all times. I choose to believe that people may change and leave, but He will never leave me. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6).

As I leave home this Saturday I'll bring this with me: "Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go" (Joshua 1:9).

Yes, He has been my companion during the lonely nights. He is always there for me.